Arrows

Hi Ladies,

We’re continuing to consider the importance of your potential husband being your financial partner. Financial wellbeing is a blessing from God, reflecting the fact that, despite traditional depictions, Jesus Christ, our Savior exemplified both spiritual and material prosperity. 3 John 2 states “Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.” Prosperity in all its’ aspects is a gift from our Father to us His children, and peaceful interaction between husband and wife in this area is essential to their happiness in marriage.

Financial concerns are not a small or insignificant matter. Unlike the arrows in the photo, pointing in different directions, a couple must come to agreement, to oneness and unity about money, or they will divide into two-ness. But oneness does not require that they think exactly the same. The reason that the Lord often joins opposites in matrimony is because their tendencies balance each other, and the marriage stays on an even keel.

So, all is not lost if you and your guy disagree about money. However, within marriage, conflicting ideas must be mitigated by compromise and consensus, and with the Lord’s help, this will happen. And both parties must also understand that our Creator holds the man ultimately accountable for the wellbeing of his family, including its finances. Since Garden of Eden days, He has tasked the male with providing for the material sustenance of his family, a role which not only do most men accept, their ego demands it.

Generally, a husband will meet the physical needs of his wife and children through work, a subject which is thoroughly covered in Scripture. Here are just a few verses:

  • Proverbs 10: 4 – “Poor is he who works with a negligent hand, but the hand of the diligent makes rich.”
  • Proverbs 12: 11 – “He who tills his land will have plenty of bread.”
  • Proverbs 13: 4 – “The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing; but the soul of the diligent is made fat.”

So, when you become a spouse, be willing to let your husband care for you…God requires it.

Testimony:

The Lord had to work mightily on me in marital financials. I was the higher wage earner, and at first, I handled the finances. My new husband brought his paychecks home, and I paid the bills, bought the groceries, etc. Until the fateful day when I miscalculated the bank balance. The resulting chaos of returned bills and overdraft charges so traumatized my spouse that he immediately took over all of the money matters.

That too turned out to be a mistake. Freed for the first time in my adult life from having to worry about managing money, I wrote checks and made purchases as I saw fit, on the assumption that he would figure it all out later. Of course, the inevitable happened again, and this time he confiscated my checkbook. There I was, the largest contributor of cash to the household, a woman who had capably reared two children alone, now reduced to asking my husband for lunch money. This was not an acceptable situation to me, and our disagreements were vocal and animated.

After a time, we agreed that I would resume writing checks under instructions to consult him first, or at least to inform him about them soon afterward. I readily consented, since that was the lesser of a whole pile of evil options I could foresee. We worked out each fiscal compromise on a case by case basis, but the turnaround in our financial relationship finally came when we made the commitment to honor God first in our tithes. When we committed our resources to Him, our income improved, and the monetary skirmishes dwindled away.

No matter where you and your potential mate are on the financial spectrum, arguments and irritations over expenditures will arise. But with the Lord as an active partner in this aspect of your relationship, you’ll have a hedge of protection against the devil and his fierce attempts to destroy your marriage covenant.

Another Partner Factor next week…Joy and Shalom!
Jo Lynne Pool