Single & Married Ladies – The Champ!

 

Hi Ladies,

I’ve covered this partner factor in a recent blog, but it’s included here because it is an essential aspect of a husband. As Believers, we ladies need our guy to be our Champion, our “strong tower”. (Psalm 61:3 – “For you have been a shelter for me, a tower of strength against the enemy”)

CHAMPION

            Dictionary.com defines “Champion” as “a person who fights for another or for a cause; defender, protector, supporter.” Starting back when we were little girls, we are naturally responsive to the oppositeness and strength inherent in men. God designed us to respond this way, to prize his physique and his deep voice, to admire his brains and his brawn. And no matter the actual physical characteristics of our man, we value his maleness, just as he values our femininity.

We expect our husband, the man who has selected us above all others, to appreciate us. We want him to love us, protect and defend us, and take on and fend off the world for us. Even if we don’t require him to do this literally, on an emotional and spiritual level, we crave this attitude in our chosen guy.

One of the deepest of marital wounds occurs when a husband shirks the responsibility to champion his wife. A man who ceases to prize her, who declines his role as her protector and supporter will cause a wife to feel abandoned, left to face hurt, angers and frustrations alone. This is not what God intended for marriage.

In His design, the husband forms an umbrella of protection over his wife and family. When sheltered under his headship, the attacks of the world and of Satan will fall around them, unable to breach the boundaries of safety that his caring provides. God directs him in 1 Peter 3:7… “You husbands…live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.”

With this in mind, take a careful look at the fellow you might want to marry. How does he treat you? Does he take you for granted? Are you the one doing most of the work to maintain the relationship? How do you truly see him? Is he the “Giant” – spiritually and emotionally the strong, good man with positive traits that you can live with and cherish forever? Or is he perhaps not such a mythic creature? Remove any blinders of love and false expectations, and see him with clear eyes and a clearer head.

If this is not a man you can respect and honor, who will champion you as his chosen wife and blessing from God, what are your motivations for marrying? Are you saying yes to him for financial support, or because you want children? Is he a ticket out of your parent’s home?   Is the wedding dress you bought five years ago on faith starting to yellow, and now you’re getting anxious? Or are you simply tired of waiting and have decided to settle, or are afraid of missing God entirely by being too picky?

It’s possible to overanalyze and hold out for unrealistic expectations, but the reality is that most of us make choices when deciding to marry. We evaluate pros and cons, and think ‘Well, he may not be this, but at least he’s not that’, or ‘I can live with this, but definitely not that.’ Since love is a cumulative process, building day by day, it can grow deeper and stronger provided the will and commitment exists in both partners.

But no woman should settle for a potential spouse who doesn’t desire, in the words of most marriage vows, to “love, honor and cherish” her. His willingness to protect and care for you is something you must never compromise on. Such commitment cannot be manufactured or faked, and without it a key ingredient of your marriage will be missing, and despite momentary happiness over being a bride, you will never be a completely joyful wife.

Until next week…Joy and Shalom!