Hi Ladies,

Sometimes the journey ahead may seem long and daunting, but it requires only one step at a time to reach your destination. If you belong to our Father, He has, or soon will have, given you a Vision for your future and your destiny. Marriage may well be waiting on your pathway, but after that there will be still more roads to take to fulfill His Will. So step out in faith, knowing that the Lord is in control, but that you must also do your part.

An essential aspect of achieving your Vision for marriage is to understand what you expect and need in a spouse. God will bring the right fellow into your life, but you must stay in touch with Him in order to recognize your man when he arrives. The key to doing this is to know yourself and your own desires. But even if you have a list of criteria, know that our Father can and will make His own adjustments to it, so be prayerful and flexible.

THE TESTIMONY

My first book, A Good Man is Hard to Find…Unless You Ask God to Be Head of Your Search Committee, shares testimonies from godly women who received the answer to their husband prayers. Here’s an excerpt from a young lady who shares her wisdom on selecting and marrying the right mate.

B.B. was a mother of three children born out of wedlock before she became a Believer and God delivered her mate. Her earlier searches for love were unsuccessful because only God could provide the right head for her family.

JP – From your vantage point as a formerly unwed mom, do you have any admonitions to share?

BB – Just be very careful. There are men out there who can see when you are vulnerable. I encourage single women to have a close friend who is also walking with the Lord, a prayer partner that you can call on. Don’t try to run the race alone. “In the multitude of counselors there is safety.” (Proverbs 11: 14). Also, be as transparent as the Lord allows you to be. Once you start hiding things, the enemy can get to you and defeat you. Be open about the feelings you are having. Stay under wise counsel! The human will, the flesh, is so strong, that if you want a thing badly enough, you can convince yourself that it’s God’s Will. You must be careful to whom you listen. The enemy is very subtle in that area.

The Lord gave some strong warnings to me in my single life. He didn’t leave me ignorant. If He gave me a word, He always gave confirmation. If I questioned Him about a man who’d come into my life, He always said, “No, this is not him.” I didn’t like it. I’d get upset and angry with God and have a temper tantrum, but the Spirit of God always watched over me and protected me. So, yield to the Spirit. “Be steadfast, immoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord” (1 Corinthians 15: 58). God dealt with me several times about that Scripture, “Commit your works to the Lord, and your thoughts will be established” (Proverbs 16: 3). You know, once the loneliness of not having a husband or father for your kids sets in, it’s hard to break that cycle in your mind. You’ll get into a pity party and think God cares nothing about you.

I belonged to a singles group once and I heard the leader say something that really turned me off. She said, “We’re the rejects.” I refused to accept that. That thought sets you up for failure. I told the Lord, ‘I do not want to be single. I will not be single.’ but whenever the desire for a husband began to consume my thought life, God would deal with me time after time about why He still said no. It’s the same as when a child doesn’t understand why the parent says no. You just have to learn that He knows best.”

More of her testimony next week…Joy and Shalom!