Single & Married Ladies – Be Careful Going Down!

Hi Ladies,

Are you thinking about descending back into some situation or person that you thought you’d left behind? If you’ve walked away once, think twice about why you’re considering taking that downhill trek again.

God expects every Believer to understand and embrace His ultimate Vision for our life, and marriage is only one component. His overall plan for us is the reason we’re on earth in the first place, and it must be our priority as well. But we can easily lose focus, get sidetracked and wander far off from our ordained pathway. If our questions about people, relationships or circumstances have been left vague or open-ended, the enemy will not hesitate to use them to torment us with indecision and wavering.

MEANING “NO”!

When it comes to questions about a specific man, since perfection is non-existent among us as humans, no matter how great a fellow may seem, it is likely that as you get to know him better you’ll encounter at least a few character traits which may cause concern. But don’t be shocked, or too hasty to abandon him in search of a flawless man. With Jesus Christ in his life, there’s no need for a guy to be perfect. He’s indwelt by Perfection Himself, and with God in control and guiding your own decision making, your choice will ultimately be mistake-proof.

But, as a single Christian lady, if a friendship with a guy isn’t developing in the way you’d hoped, or you no longer want him in your life for whatever reason, never hesitate to say “No”. It is not an unkindness or injustice when you offer no romantic encouragement to a man who is clearly not the right one or who would be toxic to you. If you’ve kept prayer and communication with God a priority and you feel led to end a connection, stick with your decision. Second-guessing your position, succumbing to pressure, or backtracking will only return you to the original distressing situation.

If you’re thinking about resuming an old attachment, try to understand exactly why you’re choosing to return to this particular fellow. Is anything significantly different now about either him or you? Do you feel you made a mistake? Has the Lord changed your mind for you? Or is the guy making a concerted effort to reenter your life, and you’re simply weakening in your resolve? It can be difficult enough to walk away in the first place, and never a good idea to do the same work twice. As always, let God be your guide.

“Watch the path of your feet, and all your ways will be established.” -Proverbs 4: 26

These are words of wisdom from our Father. If you watch what you say and do, and make as certain as you can that you are following God’s directives, then your pathway is assured, and you will not make a mistake. You can trust in the Lord and in His directions.

Remember that if you are seeking marriage, it is a lifelong covenant you will be committing to. And you must understand the reasons why this is a goal for you. The fact that God ordained marriage to be a covenant and not simply a contract demonstrates the importance that He attaches to the marital relationship. It is not a lightly made choice with an automatic ‘rescind’ option when things get uncomfortable. In the sight of the Holy Trinity, you will be bound together, forming a single unit, as inseparable as the Trinity Itself, male and female halves of a whole. God Himself forms the third cord in this unbreakable covenantal trinity, and as Ecclesiastes 4: 12 states, “…a cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.”

This means that you must take a very long-term view of any suitor that you are considering for marriage. You cannot kick him out when he’s gotten on your last nerve; or change your mind and ditch him, or replace him later with a better choice. In God’s sight, he is the one you’ve chosen and that decision is eternal. Be certain!

Until next week…Joy and Shalom!