Need 3

Hi Ladies,

Time to complete our evaluation of the three basic needs that God has implanted in His men. They’re essential to the male ego because Our Father designed them to be, but they’re not always simple for us ladies to accommodate.  Most of us, however, have little problem with Need #3.

  TO PROVIDE 

As head of his household, since Garden of Eden days, God holds the man accountable to provide for the material sustenance of his family, and on a psychological level, most men seek to fulfill that role.  If he is mentally and physically capable, his ego requires it.  Most guys provide for their family by working, and gainful employment is thoroughly addressed in the Bible.  Here are a few Scriptures:

• Proverbs 10: 4 – “He who works with a lazy hand is poor, but the hand of the diligent brings riches.”
• Proverbs 12: 11 – “He who tills his land will be satisfied with bread.”
• Proverbs 13: 4 – “The soul of a sluggard desires, and has nothing; but the soul of the diligent shall be made rich.”
• Proverbs 22: 29 – “Do you see a man who excels in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before unknown men.”
• Ecclesiastes 5: 3 – “For a dream comes through much activity.”
• Ecclesiastes 9: 10 – “Whatsoever your hand finds to do, do it with your might.”
• Proverbs 18: 9 – “He who is slothful in his work is a brother to him who is a great destroyer.”

Our wise Father knew that giving a man responsibility to provide for his loved ones would help make him more caring and concerned, as well as strengthen and weld the family unit together. On the other hand, Proverbs 19: 24 states, “A lazy man buries his hand in the bowl, and will not so much as bring it to his mouth again.”  This poor specimen of manhood would rather starve than work, and he’s certainly not interested in sharing or meeting the needs of others.  He’s unfit for marriage unless The LORD changes him.

A more subtle problem may be the circumstance where the woman has higher earning capability. If allowed to, it can become a contentious issue between the couple.  She should never succumb to the temptation to seize control or to belittle her mate, while a man must not feel diminished because of his spouse’s contributions to their support.  Money, the love of, the lack of, or the distribution of, is the single most prevalent source of conflict in marriages.  However, despite his lower wages, a wife can provide the reassurance that her husband seeks by treating him with respect, and by allowing him to be the overseer of the household that God called him to be.

 

MEANING “NO”!

One last point to consider – males are generally resilient, and they appreciate clarity.  As a single lady, if a friendship with a man isn’t developing in the way you’d hoped, or you no longer want him in your life for whatever reason, never hesitate to say NO.  It is not an unkindness or injustice when you offer no romantic encouragement to a guy who is clearly not the right one or who would be toxic to you.  Keep prayer a priority, and if you feel led to end contact, stick with your decision.  Second-guessing your position, succumbing to pressure, or backtracking will only return you to the original situation.

Realizing that perfection is rare, no matter how great a fellow may seem, it is likely that as you get to know him you’ll encounter at least a few traits of concern to you. But don’t be shocked, or too hasty to abandon him in search of a perfect man.  With Jesus Christ in his life, there’s no need for a guy to be perfect.  He is indwelt by Perfection Himself, and if God is in control and guiding your own decisions, your choice will ultimately be mistake-proof.

Now that we’ve considered his needs, next week we’ll begin evaluating the needs that The LORD has placed within His Godly Women. Joy and Shalom!