The JEALOUS Man

Hi Ladies,

Here’s the last of the “Warning” Guys – those who are SAVED – BUT who have major issues that Scripture cautions against.  Don’t be discouraged by the litany of poor matrimonial choices that we’ve reviewed so far…in the midst of the weeds, your godly Lion may be waiting.  Just be aware of some of the bogus ‘blessings’ that you may encounter while awaiting The LORD’s destined mate.

THE JEALOUS MAN

This fellow is the worst type of controlling man.  He will swear on his Bible that all he’s trying to do is love his woman, that he needs her and cares for her more than anything else in the world.  He’ll tell himself that he’s only trying to protect her, and that she just doesn’t recognize the rampant dangers surrounding her.

Or he may be so insecure that he reads negative motives into her every movement, and tries to monitor them all, while making her life miserable under the guise of ‘love’.  This guy is afflicted with a desperate need to see into his lady’s thought processes.  But since he doesn’t have access to them, he has to settle for tracking her actions, or her eyes, or anything that indicates the reality of his worst fear, that she is not truly his.

In extreme versions of this man’s world, there is no such thing as an ‘innocent’ interaction between his wife and another male. As a Christian, he likely understands that this is wrong, but he struggles to prevent the demonic thoughts from entering and dictating his actions.  He has to fight a real battle to control himself, not his spouse.

We women may feel flattered at first, mistakenly believing that this man cares deeply for us, but jealousy is not a personality trait to be lightly regarded.  His obsessive behavior has nothing to do with actually loving a person.  Proverbs 27: 4 warns that “Wrath is cruel, and anger a torrent, but who is able to stand before jealousy?”  News reports constantly on women who’ve been harmed by a jealous vengeful man when they tried to change their situations.

Seek The LORD mightily before you begin even a casual friendship with a fellow who displays these tendencies. Exercise your God-ordained wisdom, and let Our Father control the outcome.  Philippians 4: 6 advises “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.”

There are plenty of other guys who may be lurking nearby, ungodly ones that a prayerful woman should have no hesitation in avoiding.  Included in this group are chronic womanizers who will never be faithful, liars who can never be trusted, and married men who are completely forbidden for obvious reasons.  Also to be avoided are those with whom you share little in common, because there will be no deeply rooted foundation of mental and spiritual connection upon which to build a marriage.

Of course, wonderful Christian guys  who don’t display these negative traits are actually out there as well, and when The LORD blesses you with one of these exemplary fellows, rejoice!  And there is always the possibility that a flawed Believer may, in fact, be the man that God has chosen for you.  Our Father will not place more burden upon you than you can handle.  I Corinthians 10: 13 notes “No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, Who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.”  If such a man is for you, He will impart to you the love and the strength you’ll need to withstand the trials to come.

The male characteristics we’ve covered are excerpts from my new book – LOVE IN THE BOOK 2 – The Partner Guide,  coming soon.  My book, A GOOD MAN IS HARD TO FIND…Unless You  Ask God to Be Head of Your Search Committee can be purchased on the Contact page.

Next, we’ll move into what our Bible has to say about building relationships.  Joy and Shalom!