Hi Ladies,

Let’s consider some specific types of men that the Bible warns mightily against. Marriage-ready ladies can experience uncertainty when these guys show up, because they may look good on the surface and might appear to be the answer to prayers, but they bring serious issues. Among these problems is the urge to question God’s intention, to doubt His Word, or to walk away from His promises.

For a Believing Lady, the most obvious of problematic men are those who are unsaved. The only fellows we can confidently marry are men of faith, saved and committed followers of Our LORD Jesus Christ. The Bible states this as a non-negotiable requirement.

2 Corinthians 6: 14-16 admonishes, “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers…”

Every woman, when contemplating a potential spouse, must realize the importance of the question of “To whom does he listen and submit?” When a man is about to assume the crucial role of being your wedded mate for life, only one who is a Believer will receive his directions from Christ Himself. Only such a man can be trusted, in turn, to be a reliable leader for your life and family.

Unfortunately, unsaved men can be an enormous temptation if allowed to gain a foothold. Interesting and interested non-believers may be all around, and can seem to be far more available than the scare-as-hens’ teeth single Christian guys.

So what’s the big deal? We were all unsaved at some point, and God transformed us into His Own. Why can’t we just take a nice unbeliever and get him saved?

The woman entertaining this question has high hopes that Our Father will work everything out on her behalf. Rather than waiting for His chosen mate, she hopes He will give His approval to the mate she has chosen, converting him, and making her choice alright in the end. But as I Corinthians 7: 16 questions, “For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? “ God has given no guarantee of this man’s future salvation. Yet she will be entering into a binding covenant with a man who receives no direction from the Creator to whom she has submitted her life.

If she proceeds with this union, she implicitly accepts all that entails. She will deal not only with the normal marital stresses, but also with those unique to their differing world views. She may well experience the despair of truly loving a person, but knowing each day that he is a lost soul. And she will also discover the reality of the question in Amos 3: 3: “Can two walk together unless they are agreed?”

A more subtle snare is the man who is posing as a Believer. The fact that you met him in church is no guarantee of his salvation. This analogy is still true: “Sitting in church will not make you a Christian any more than sitting in the garage will make you a car.” Just because he was occupying a pew, you cannot assume he’s truly been saved. He may also only be pretending in order to please you. A woman must always “try the spirits” (1 John 4: 1) of the man she is interested in, and her spirit will confirm his position in Christ.

If you feel tempted to venture into the non-believing world for love, resist the urge by understanding the doubt from which it springs. Let The LORD lead you onto the paths you should take. Your husband-to-be, your future happiness, and your relationship with The Father Himself are all at stake, and compromising will never ensure the unfolding of God’s perfect plan for your life.

You can also rest assured that, as one of my pastors used to say, “God has not called you to missionary dating.”

More snares and tares next week…until then, Joy and Shalom!